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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28639479">Unrequited or misunderstood?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/KilluaZoldick/pseuds/KilluaZoldick'>KilluaZoldick</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Hunter X Hunter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, M/M, Misunderstandings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 12:27:16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,361</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28639479</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/KilluaZoldick/pseuds/KilluaZoldick</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Killua gains the courage to finally confess to his childhood friend, Gon. will his feelings be returned and will their friendship ever be the same again?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Gon Freecs &amp; Killua Zoldyck, Gon Freecs/Killua Zoldyck</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>62</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Unrequited or misunderstood?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After thirteen years of knowing Gon, Killua was finally prepared to confess to his childhood friend.</p>
<p>They had both just turned nineteen. It was summer vacation and as always, the two of them where hanging out. </p>
<p>Killua had spent far too long practicing his confession in the mirror. How was one supposed to tell their best friend that they love them, always have, anyway? It was a dangerous bet, a hope, that Killua finally dared to take on.</p>
<p>Of course he had needed some convincing. A form of proof that Gon might actually share these feelings, that he felt. Small things like touches, hugs and such. Maybe the way he spoke, and if he spoke about Killua those few rare times they weren’t together.  He had studied to find these for months now. Finally coming up with enough, along with the courage to confess in the first place. </p>
<p>Killua didn’t want to risk it. Gon wasn’t the type to completely ghost him, even if he didn’t feel the same. But even so, their friendship would never be the same again.</p>
<p>Thinking about it now, this might all be a bad idea. Although Gon had come out to him as bi, the chances were still that he would prefer a female over a male. Maybe he didn’t want Killua, why would he anyway? He should probably just not confess, it was safest that way, painful, but safe.</p>
<p>No, Killua stop, you worked so hard to finally grow the balls to confess, don’t get cold feet now.</p>
<p>“Is something the matter?” Gon asked in his usual cheery tone. “Do you not like the movie? We can watch something else if that’s the case, or do something entirely else, if you want to.” Kind as always, he always seemed to care about Killua’s feelings, much unlike his parents.</p>
<p>“It’s not that, just got a lot on my mind” he answered honestly. There was no use in lying anyway when Gon read him like an open book.</p>
<p>“Did your parents fight again?” He asked, this time less cheerful. </p>
<p>“Ah, no, not this time” he mumbled out the last part. Gon was always there for him whenever his parents started yelling at each other. He had always been there, holding his hand or making stupid jokes that never failed to make him laugh.</p>
<p>They had a small tree house in Gon’s backyard. They used it as a meeting spot. Killua could easily get to it by climbing out his window, and so they spent the night in there, sometimes, on bad nights. </p>
<p>They were neighbors after all, that’s how they met, back when they were only six. </p>
<p>Two completely different families. Killua’s, with his workaholic parents and annoying siblings, apart from Alluka that is, and then Gon’s with his motherlike aunt and caring grandma.</p>
<p>Yet somehow the two boys clicked right away. They were best friends since Kindergarten, always know as a team. Unbreakable. If Killua’s fears came to life, that would all change. </p>
<p>“You know you can tell me whatever, right?” Gon broke his train of overthinking. Probably noticing how Killua had spaced out. The lack of background noise told him that the movie had been paused. </p>
<p>Ah, well, fuck it. He couldn’t keep anything from Gon anyway.</p>
<p>“Alright” he mumbled, gathering as much courage as he could get his hands on. Gon was looking at him with patient eyes and a small reassuring smile. He was a good listener, Killua had come to know.</p>
<p>He took a deep breath in attempt of calming down, but it didn’t really work much.</p>
<p>“I have something I want to tell you, and it’s been bugging me for a while.” Gon gave a small nod for him to continue. They were sitting on the old couch in Gon’s room, turned 90°, knee to knee and face to face. “I really like you” he said, quick and nervous.</p>
<p>“I like you too, Killua!” Gon said with a cheery smile, it gave Killua so much hope and happiness, that died hard shortly after, when “you’re the best friend i could ever ask for” was added. </p>
<p>He felt the tight clench in his chest, it was painful, very much so. Maybe Gon just misunderstood, he should explain himself a bit more. “No, I mean, I like you, as more than just a friend. Much more” he said painfully, barely keeping the tears as the fear In him grew. He wasn’t even rejected yet, get your shit together Killua. </p>
<p>Gon’s expression didn’t change much. It was unreadable. </p>
<p>“Oh, um” he mumbled, but Killua heard. </p>
<p>He got up from the couch, grabbing his socks from the floor and left. Gon didn’t even say anything, didn’t even call his name as he escaped down stairs and out of the house. </p>
<p>“Hey Killua, going back so early?” Mito asked from where she was watering flowers in the front yard.</p>
<p>“Yeah, something came up” he said, swallowing the knot in his throat.</p>
<p>“See you soon then” she greeted and he left in a hurry. He could hear her whisper something to Gon’s grandma, but didn’t hear what.</p>
<p>He was barely inside his own room when the dam broke. His sobs came out unsteady and disgusting. The only thing he was able to do was mess things up. Would Gon even look at him again? Why did he have to be so selfish and confess. </p>
<p>One tear and then another fell to the ground, landing between his feet and he hugged his knees. This would all be the end, right? They would slowly fall apart, not even trying to fix it, because they both know why.</p>
<p>Killua could picture it all, as thirteen years fall through his hands and disappears.</p>
<p>“Stupid, stupid, stupid” he repeated as he banged his head into his knees. He really gone and fucked up, it was all his fault. He wanted to scream, but Milluki would only taunt him if he heard.</p>
<p>Then, his phone vibrated in his pocket. </p>
<p>He ignored it at first, not being in the mood to talk to anyone right now, but the buzzing repeated and eventually he was forced to look.</p>
<p>Gon: come to the treehouse<br/>Gon: please, we need to talk.<br/>Gon: Killua<br/>Gon: please?<br/>Gon: I’m not mad at yuo</p>
<p>Killua looked down at the spam of texts, wiping a forming tear from his eye. Gon wanted to talk? About what? Was he going to reject him again?</p>
<p>Gon: I know you are reading this! Please jus tgive me a minute to talk at least!</p>
<p>Killua wiped his eyes a few more times, getting up from the floor. He put his phone back in his pocket before opening his window to jumping out onto one of the trees branches. He could already see Gon through the small window in the wooden house, he looked sad, looking down at something.</p>
<p>He jumped into Gon’s yard and climbed the ladder up to the treehouse. </p>
<p>“Killua..” was spoken before he even managed to sit down.</p>
<p>“Just get it over with” Killua said, voice still raspy from crying. </p>
<p>“I didn’t call you here to reject you” Gon spoke quickly, genuinely. “No, actually it’s the opposite” he added, fiddling with his fingers. Killua’s eyes opened wide, but he stayed quiet. </p>
<p>“I really like you too, Killua. I just never gained the courage to tell you” Gon said nervously. It was so uncharacteristic for him, to be nervous.</p>
<p>“Then why didn’t you say anything?” Killua asked, looking Gon in the eyes. He was tearing up again, only Gon could make him this vulnerable.</p>
<p>“You didn’t let me. I was still processing everything. Mito came up and asked me what happened and it wasn’t before then I really understood” Gon said, scratching his neck. “I’m sorry, I never wanted to hurt you” </p>
<p>“No, no. I’m just happy you feel the same” Killua smiled, looking down at his hands to avoid the smile Gon gave him. It was too bright for him to look at, anyway. He felt really relieved, he didn’t actually fuck up. Their friendship wasn’t ruined and they could still be together. Even better than that, Gon liked him back.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is one of my coping fics I write at the shitcrack of night, to cope with depression aha! Oh well, hope you enjoyed, or something.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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